Friday, September 11, 2009

EVERYDAY LESSON

Words of wisdom are afloat all around us. Each person has a favourite quote, sometimes there own, often someone else's wisdom.

If followed, they help in making life simpler. My father always said, "The family that eats together, stays together." We always followed that rule. No one had the freedom to say that they were not hungry and would eat later. The choice that was given to us was, that one could eat as much as was needed. However, food would be laid on time and all were to come and eat. It was a good system as, it was convenient for the person who had made the food, and also the person who would pick up afterwards. The servants could also finish their work at one go. There was no need for heating, reheating and waiting. He always said in a sing song way, "On the table at 8 o' clock for breakfast. On the table at 8 o' clock for dinner." People were out at lunch time in school or work or whatever, so there was no rule for lunch. The routine was such that each one of us would be home on time and eat together. It was good discussion and bonding time for the family.

Another teaching of his was that we should never tell a lie. He insisted that we should never lie even jocularly. We followed this teaching.

My mother used to tell us to chew our food properly. She as a child had been told to chew every bite at least 32 times. I know, it sounds far fetched, but think about it. If one chews so many times, the feeling of satisfaction will set in faster. One would eat less. The feeling of wanting to keep on eating would not be there. In the end, it would result in a trimmer and healthier person. We normally keep on eating without the need to eat a bit more and yet more....

TNN my husband used to tell me never to threaten the children with threats which I would not be able to carry out. Also never make promises that were not possible to fulfil. I saw a lot of wisdom in that. I followed the dictum and it has stood me in good stead.

When we got a dog, when we were trying to train him, Ujjwal my brother said to me, never beat him, only threaten him with the rolled newspaper. Because if you beat him, he will know the extent of distress it can cause, and then he will not be scared. It is only the unknown of which one can be scared of.

There is so much of wisdom and good lessons given to us in simple everyday practices. Honesty, togetherness, compassion, concern and care for each other is a virtue that can only lead to happiness and peace. Small steps taken by each family leads to improvement in the culture of the society which one inhabits.

We are so quick to be shocked by behaviour of all and sundry in society. If we try at our small unit level of home to instil proper discipline, teach respect for each other and also ensure to treat everyone equally, there would be a lot less injustice in society as a whole. Our own bias, our treatment of servants, our behaviour with people of lesser standing in society all are seen and copied by our family members. Our own behaviour and attitude has to be exemplary, only then can we point a finger at others for their shortcomings.

2 comments:

triloki nagpal said...

This blog post is indeed "Words of Wisdom". I am really proud to have you as my better half and I can never seem to fathom the depth of your knowledge and intelligence

Ujjwalta said...

And attitude comes from our basic beliefs and philosophy. It is grounding in the rational philosophy that creates a kind and compassionate attitude.
The cruel philosophies of weapon carrying gods terrorising the ignorant, create the negativity and despair that we see all around us.
Thanks to Daddy, we received the right philosophy.

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